Middle Man
by Raven55
Summary: Being in the middle of something is never easy. Especially not when it means not being able to tell Ginny that Harry still loves her, though you correspond with him regularly. Ron finally decides that Harry has to make a choice. Tell Ginny the truth or...


**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.  
**AN:** I wrote this as a way to get all the stress and frustrations for my upcoming midterms out of my system, and it got a little heavier than I expected. I hope you enjoy it though!

* * *

**Middle Man**

* * *

I'm not quite sure how to start this letter. I'm not sure I should be writing this at all. After all, it doesn't seem like it's my place to criticise you. Not after having been part of your scheme without complaint from the very beginning.

But I've only been a courier back and forth of your indirect messages to my sister this long, because I believed it was in her best interest. I only went along for the sake of her well-being and with that goal in mind, I reclaim my right to question you.

I wonder if you even realise how impossibly trapped I have felt for the last few months. You tell me to let her know that you're still alive, without actually saying the message was meant for her, and I do it. I pretend you sent _me_ a letter, or that I overheard someone from the Order and then I 'accidentally' let it slip when she's within earshot.

I must admit, I felt proud the first few weeks that I had been able to fool her like that. But on the other hand it made me more sad than you can ever imagine.

Don't you think this is a sad situation you worked yourself into too?

I don't understand why I never asked this before, but why do you send me all these letters? What's the point in making me put on a show for her instead of just writing her directly?

Is it so hard to admit that you miss her and that you love her so much that it feels like you're going to burst?

And why, if I can't convey all those emotions to her, do you tell me about them? Every time I see her now, I feel like she can see I know more than I let on. She can see right through me, something you should know all about.

She deserves to know you still love her and if you won't tell her the complete truth, then I feel obligated to do it myself.

What you are trying to do, noble as it might seem in your own mind, isn't going to be enough anymore, not for you, for her, or for me. If you want her to know you think about her, and that you hope to return to her someday and then pick up where you left off, then you need to act like the man she believes you to be and reach out to her yourself right now.

Soon, you will want more than just my letters about her. Soon you will want to hold her again, kiss her and make up for all the time you had her spend in misery. You will want her to write to you, to think about you with happy thoughts instead of with tears. You will want to be sure that she is still there for you, waiting until you come home.

And soon, if you don't let her know how you still feel, she might just give up. Not because she doesn't believe in you, but because the burden of loneliness is just too heavy for her to bear.

She won't be able to cope without someone there to support her through these difficult days of war, and in order to feel a little bit better she will turn to someone else for comfort.

Soon the words I say to calm her won't be enough to take away her fears and her unease. And you should know there are enough men lurking in corners, who are willing to offer her a shoulder if it means she forgets about you and continues with one of them.

If you don't show her a sign of life soon, I'll be forced to quit as your middle man. I can't settle for letters and subtle hints that hurt her more than they make up for. Do you honestly think that she feels better, hearing from _me_ that you're alright? She believes that I am more important to you than she is, that you don't care about her anymore, that you've forgotten about her completely.

Well, I won't be the one causing my sister the hurt she is going through every single day any more. I don't want to be the one who has to pretend he can't see the burning tears she is hiding. I won't have anything to do with it anymore.

You don't know what it's like to see her wandering around aimlessly day after day. She's my sister, Harry. She's my family. And I want to protect my family from any harm that can come to them, and that includes heartache like this.

At first she was strong. She said she understood, that it was your destiny to fight in this war and that she could imagine that there was no place for her in your life amongst all the battles that were still to come. She assured me, and everyone else, that she was doing fine, that she could manage to get through life without being able to help you, without being beside you. She has always been a strong girl. Even when she was little, she barely cried about anything. She was tough enough to handle anything that came onto her path.

But since you broke up with her I have seen her will crumble a little every day. She smiles and goes about her daily routine like there is nothing wrong. But it's only during the night that she can be herself and cry.

Every one knows but nobody says a thing. Everyone pretends that she is fine because she herself pretends to be fine. But she misses you. She loves you. And nothing anyone says can make the pain her heart feels stop.

Until yesterday I was like everybody else in the house. I pretended she was fine. I smiled along with her and we did our chores like we always do. But she suddenly just stopped and turned around to face me. This was the first time I had ever seen her with tears running down her cheeks. It's something I never hope to see again because my heart broke.

She looked at me though her heavy eyelashes and asked me if I could just hug her for a moment, that she'd be fine if she only had an arm around her for a little while. And while I held her, she tried to stop her tears from coming, but she couldn't. She broke down, right there, while I was holding her.

I don't know how long we stood there like that but I will never forget that moment. I can't allow anyone to cause her the pain that made her break down like that anymore, Harry. I don't ever want to see her like that again.

I couldn't bear it if she ever had to undergo such sad and tormenting emotions a second time. I therefor had to write this letter, to let you know you have only two choices, two options left. Either you become a part of her life again or you leave her alone for ever.

Just keep in mind that there is more to a destiny than just the one path. It's not just a straight line to follow, not just the one thing to it. There is more for you than just fighting Voldemort. If that was the only thing you're destined to do, then what would there be left for you after the war is over?

I've always believed that strings of fate can be tied together, so that you don't need to reach your end goal alone. So that there is a reason to go on after your main duty is done. I think that Ginny is your reason to go on, your reason not to stop after Voldemort is dead. Her fate is intertwined with yours whether you like it or not. Her life is part of yours and your life is part of hers. Don't go denying that you two belong together. It's been clear enough from the beginning. There's more to destiny than just the one path, Harry.

But whatever choice you end up making, it's a final decision. You can't pick one and then change lanes to the other. If you choose to disappear from her life, you can't try to contact her ever again, not in any way. No letters, no notes, no returning to her when your job is done. You can either be with her or not, there's no middle road to take anymore. It's your choice to make, Harry. I can't help you decide. But it's either all or nothing and nothing in between.

It's a tough decision, that will never become easier. Waiting long won't make it less painful for anyone. But what ever you decide to do, cut out the middle man. Delete me from the equasion. Write to her personally and tell her your resolve whether it's a last letter or the first of many, depending on your choice.

Should you choose to sever all your ties with her, then there is no possibility to continue our friendship, making this my last letter to you. Not because I'd be offended, but because I couldn't look Ginny straight in the eyes if I secretly kept in touch with you after that. But I must insist that you only think of Ginny's future while deciding what to do. Our friendship should not be part of the equasion because that is a totally different matter that shouldn't influence the outcome of all this.

You are the best friend I have ever had and I don't think a friendship like ours is one you can come across easily. I therefor hope that someday soon Ginny will tell me that you contacted her again. I trust you to make a good choice, _the right choice_, and for the right reasons. Good luck.

Ron.


End file.
